My little cutey!

Better late than never!

Ok - I know I have not written in so long it is almost silly of me to start up again. But, it's my blog so I will if I want to :)

A few quick updates...

I have a daughter now - her name is Anika Rose. She is absolutly beautiful and sweet and perfect in every way. Wanna see? (sorry to all those on facebook - these pics will all be repeats...)

I think Facebook is why I hardly blog anymore...but, I like blogging better - facebook is just quicker. Mental note - spend more time blogging and less time on facebook.

Sam is now a sasssy 2 year old. However, he is also still perfect and wonderful :)

And the dynamic duo...

I am still trying to regain my former thinner figure...and trying to learn to like the one I have now. So far, no success on either front...

Still working at home and praying to not be laid off.

Just finished The Friday Night Knitting Club and now plan to knit Sam a scarf using the pattern from the book.

I know I am not up on much that is current but, exactly what did Obama do to get the Nobel Peace prize?

And why is it that the guy who's commercial I hear on the radio who's running for something (don't remember what) is for gay marriage but also for gun control? Can't we have a politician who wants to hunt in rainbow colored camo's???? Dammit - I wanna see my gay friends get married and wanna go shoot with with them too! (not that they all shoot but, one does! :)

Ok - that's it for now. Hopefully I will go back to being a more regular blogger...which reminds me, what exactly does it mean to be irregular? Anyone know? I see those Activia commercials with Jamie Lee Curtis and I have no freakin clue what she's talking about...too lazy to google it though...

Wonderful Day at the Park

Today we had a wonderful day at the park (hence - the title) and I just wanted to write about it so I didn't forget it. Unfortunately, I forgot my camera at home so do not have any pictures.

It was the first really nice sunny day that fell on playgroup day. We met up at Humbolt park on the East Side of Providence. Sam and I hadn't been there since last Fall so it was great to be back. We also hadn't seen some of our playgroup friends in so long so that was nice too to see mostly everyone again.

Sam had such a good time!!! He started off slow playing with some toys he played with last year. But then, he was off to the climby thing with stairs and slides! He was doing really good for a while going up the stairs and down the slides. Then, he decided to go down the big slide on his belly face first. Wump - nose digger right into the wood chips! He was not happy - poor little guy. And, low and behold, the first bloody nose!!! Is this cruel of me, I thought it was an exciting milestone? :) He was great though, cried for a little bit but let me wipe the blood off and then he was his normal happy self. He ended up with a little cut on his lip too. One other little fall of a plastic climbing thing was the extent of his mishaps for the day. The rest of the time, he was having fun fun fun!!! He didn't even get upset when a couple of older kids used him for target practice with sand. Parents intervened and Sam decided to seek out enjoyment somewhere else other than the sand box. Sam mostly played by himself but did have some moments of nice interaction with the other kids. He certainly never felt the need to stay near Mommy! He wandered all over the place while I watched from our blankets like a momma hawk.

The big moment for me was when it was time to go. I was dreading this. I always hate to dissapoint him but I had to be home for work and it was his nap time. I gathered up all of our stuff and walked over to where he was playing. I bravely mustered up my courage and told him we had to go. He said, "no." I asked him if he would walk with me to the gate. He said, "ok." Hmmmm, maybe this will be good after all? So, we get to the gate, I open it and he walks through out onto the side walk. I'm thinking, "wow! he left the park without doing the kicking tantrum thing - sweet!!!" Now we are on the sidewalk on a semi-busy street. I would really feel more comfortable if he was holding my hand but I know Sam, he never - ever - holds hands. Even when he was learning to walk. Very independant. But, I'm a sucker for punishment, so I ask anyway. Wouldn't you know it - he put one of his cute pudgy little hands in mine!!! He walked with me that way all the way to the truck! At one point, we became disconnected and he held out his and and said, "hand!" I was so excited! I had been getting worried that I'd never be able to teach him the whole holding hands thing when walking near traffic and crossing the street. Plus, it was just so sweet to walk with him that way. :) I plopped him in the truck and got him strapped in and headed home. He was asleep about 5 minutes later. All in all - a very pleasant leave taking of the park.

I sure do love my little man!!!

Since I don't have a picture from today, here are a couple from last year...

Miracle!!!

Sam has managed to accomplish something that neither I nor my husband can seem to do on a regular basis. I gave him a cup that had a little bit of juice on the bottom. He finished the juice and then toddled over to the dishwasher, opened it up, put the cup in and shut the door. I am now giving him the rest of the dirty dishes scattered throughout the house to put in the dishwasher. That boy is going to make someone a fine husband some day! He even put the cups in the right way!!

Webster! We need more words!

One thing that has annoyed me since Sam was born is that there are no words to describe the love for a child. I love my husband. I love lobster. I love a good BM. So, love doesn't seem like an adequate word. We need a new one. I know in other languages there are all different kinds of words for love. We seem to be lacking.

But, what would such a word sound like? What combination of constinents and vowels could capture such an emotion? I don't even have any idea how to describe such a love. I just wish there was a word I could use.

Wanna see some pictures?

Since my recent posts have had a lack of pictures, I thought I would post a few here:



Before we had Sam, we liked to ride our motorcycles. We each had one since I refused to ride on the back. We sold the bikes when I got pregnant since we didn't want to risk leaving our babe an orphan. We used the money we got from the sale of the bikes to buy a camper since that seemed a much more family friendly activity :)

In June of 2005, we went on an amazing trip to the Grand Canyon. We did a white water rafting trip down the Colorado River. We spent the nights on the banks of the river. During the day, we were either travelling on the river or doing day hikes up and down the sides of the canyon. We went with my Dad and my little brother. It was a trip I will never forget!

Sam was born on 8/5/07 around 4pm. Here is a picture of the two of us shortly after we were brought into the recovery room.

A couple of cute random Sam shots:

Sam on Halloween:

Recent pic:

Anika's first u/s:

Potty training???

Maybe I am wrong but I think Sam is potty training himself??? I introduced the potty to him a few months ago in an effort to try late introduction of elimination communication (EC.) He liked it but we couldn't really get the signal thing going. Just too much other stuff going on. The potty ended up being put away for a while. I recently brought it back out one morning because it seemed like a good time to catch a poop. Since then, he's definetely interested in the potty. I, however, still have too much going on to really try to establish the whole communication thing. I figured, if I knew it was his normal time of day to poop, and all the other stars were aligned, I'd bring out the potty. If not, he can go in his diaper. No big deal. Sam started to say "poop" but not always when there was a poop or when he had to go. Once in a while, he would say "poop" and "potty" and I'd try then to get the potty out. Only once though did we catch something and it was pee.

Today, he said "poop" and "potty." He also pointed to his diaper and said, "off." So, I get out the potty. I read to him when he sits on it. A book always helps me go so I figure, maybe it will help him too? Anyway, he's definetely working on something but when he gets up, just pee. I very excitedly praised him for his efforts said "yay - pee!" or something like that. He sat back down so it looked like he had more to do. He kept getting up and down and checking. I would ask, "are you done?" and he'd say, "more" and sit back down. Finally, he said he was done. No poo. I put a diaper on him and cleaned him up. I pretty much figured he'd poop in the diaper shortly but wasn't going to force him to sit on the potty. A little while later we are downstairs. Sam is playing and I am watching TV. He goes, "poop" and then goes "potty?" and says, "off." By this time, I'm pretty tired. I've been dealing with a cold all weekend long and really just want to relax. So, when he doesn't insist on anything, I figure, he'll poop in the diaper and I will change him. Easier than going back upstairs, getting out the potty blah blah blah.

Well, next thing I know...he's got his clothes all undone, his diaper off and there is poop everywhere!!! Luckily by then my husband had come downstairs. He took Sam upstairs for a batch and I cleaned up the carpet and shoes and sippy cup and toy that all had poop on them.

Important lesson learned - when given the gift of a child who wants to potty train early, listen to what he says!!! Way easier than cleaning up after :)

By the way, I realize this is a very long post basically just about my son's bowel movements. I don't honestly think there are a ton of people interested in this. I have to admit, my blog is more for me than for others. It is a fun way for me to remember things that I otherwise may forget. So, I'm sorry if I am boring you!!! And I know blogs are more interesting with pictures but I just seem to be blogging lately about stuff I don't have pictures for. I did have one of a pile of poop in the potty but, I don't think anyone really needs to see that...do they?

Birth

I read this post on my friend's blog and was going to make a comment but realized it would be too long. So, I'm putting a link to the post here...read it first and then come back if you want...

I was at Women & Infants recently to get checked out after a car accident. I wanted to make sure Anika was okay. Because of the whole blood type RH thing, they decided I should have a Rogham shot. I am a pretty big baby when it comes to shots. I don't like them. They hurt. What's to like? So, afterwards the nurse commented that she thought it would be funny (in a coincidental type of way) if she was my nurse for Anika's birth and she had to be with me when I got an epidural. I explained that I was planning to have a drug free birth. She's like, "why???" I explained I thought it was better for the baby. She had this funny look on her face like, "this lady is nuts!"

I had an epidural with Sam, it wasn't my plan but I ended up with one. Looking back, I think it could have been avoided if I had done a couple things during labor differently...

1. Stayed home longer. I mistakenly thought, the sooner I get to the hospital, the sooner Sam will be born. I had done enough research to know differently but it was kind of a "simple mind" take over thing.

2. When I was at the hospital, I let the midwife break my water. Again that was me trying to rush things. I was already having enough problems handling the contractions. Having my water broked was a stupid thing to do. Midwife suggested it but I should have known better than to accept.

I consider going to the hospital the first intervention. It's not necessary to go to a hospital to have birth. It's certainly not necessary to go to that hospital to labor for birth. We do plan to have Anika in the hospital. But, I will try to stay home much longer this time.

The breaking of the water was the second intervention. Sam would have taken care of that when he was ready.

I then ended up needing the epidural - 3rd intervention. I didn't list that above as something I could have done differently because I don't think I could have. I was delirious with pain.

Then the interventions just kept coming, I don't know how many wires I had going up my hooha but it was definetely too many! I was so close to a C-section which would have been the ultimate intervention.

I know this is all kind of redundant since I wrote about all this in my birth story but since the post I referanced up top was about interventions, I wanted to point them out.

Now, to the point...I think we need to get to a place where if someone says, "I plan to have a drug free birth." the natural reaction would be, "of course!" And if someone says, "I plan to have an epidural" then the reaction would then be, "why?" (in a nice friendly curious way - not a judgemental look down upon way.)

The funny thing is, insurance companies are notorious for refusing to pay for things they deem unneccessary. We're talking procedures that can really help someone and improve the quality of their life. But, they have no problem at all in paying so much extra money for births where interventions were chosen even if they were not necessary. How did that happen? I think if someone has a drug free birth, the insurance company should give that person some type of credit or bonus or something. And if a person has a home birth, they should get a huge bonus! It's odd to think about but the industry that is known for being the worst offender when it comes to being money greedy could have a huge positive impact in the way babies are born...and still improve their bottom line. Maybe then people that need experimental treatments or things like that would have a better chance of having them covered by the insurance companies.

Weird Dreams

I had two very weird dreams last night that I wanted to write about. I know weird dreams can be common while pregnant but these were just really strange. I am not 100% sure if they were two separate dreams or one dream that changed in the middle but I'm going to treat them as two. If anyone can interpret these - let me know!!!

1. Sam was on trial for murder. Not as an older person but as the 19mo he currently is. He was found innocent because everyone thought he was so cute at the trial. He was being his normal self blowing kisses and saying "bye" to all the people. After the trial, we went to another room where the spare jururs were. It seemed like maybe they had been thinking he was guilty until they saw him in person and then they also were won over by his cuteness. That is all I remember of that one. I don't know who he was supposed to have killed or how he was supposed to have done it.

2. Tom Cruise was trying to eat Sam. Like attack him and eat him like an animal eats prey. Very scary. He was chasing us. I ended up having to shove a cooked chicken into his mouth to stall him and then we ran away. As I was running to my car, I was thinking - should I put Sam in the car seat or is it okay to break the law since Sam's life is already in danger and just put him in the car and go? Then, just as I got to the car, some people showed up wanting me to fill out paperwork. I am not really sure for what - maybe the trial from dream #1? Anyway, that is when I woke up.

Blog posts to come

So, I really enjoy blogging but don't do it often enough. Or, when I have time, I can't think of anything to say. Today, I have made a handy dandy little list that will reside in the sidebar. I am hopeing this list will inspire me to blog more often. And, maybe create a little suspense for my 2 readers :)

3/11: turned out to be too stressful to have a list. I have enough stuff to do already!!!

Did you know?

Did you know that if you add up all the water used by the repeated toilet flushings of the average pregnant woman, it totals up all of the water in all of the oceans combined?!?!?!?!

Okay - I made that up :) But, I sure can't wait till I don't have to go to the bathroom so freakin often!!! I know - to much info - my blog - deal with it!!!

She's a girl!!! and tax rumbling

This is a bit late in coming and I think my 2 readers already know this but, I wanted to post anyway...new baby is a girl!!! We are very excited to be having one of each. I would have enjoyed two boys but am glad to be going to have the experience of a girl. So far I have bought one dress and one bow for her hair. I have to admit, I love all the girly stuff! I should post pictures here of the ultrasound and the cute little bow and dress but, I haven't taken any yet...maybe later :)

We have a name picked out - Anika. We think it is a very pretty name that is not too common. Which is what we wanted :) It is in the 500's on the SS names list. I hope she likes it. No middle name yet....

So, last night we had our taxes done. Our tax guy is super popular and routinely runs hours behind his appointments. My appointment was at 3. I called and was told to show up at 5. I got in to see the guy close to 7. He's very good though and we are getting a nice chunck of change back. All backed up by my meticulous documentation :) I felt bad for the guy though, he actually fell asleep twice!!! Just two quick little nod offs lasting seconds each but still - the guy was obviously super tired. He's very dedicated to getting his clients the most money and spends a lot of time on each one. So, even though he was obviously tired, I'm confident he got us all that is possible.

What is my rumble? Well, I don't pay for childcare so I don't get to deduct that. Now, obviously since I don't have the expense I am not out any money but it just seems like since I do both childcare and work at the same time - I should get some type of cool credit??? Maybe I am just being greedy. It's just really hard to work and take care of Sam all at once so it would be nice to have the IRS say, "good job! He'res a whole crap load of money!" I know this is absolutely ridiculous but, it is nice to dream :) Seriously though, it would be nice if those of us who stayed at home with our kids got something....whether we work or not. Ok - that's it.

Sam's Birth Story

When Sam was born, I wasn't yet blogging. Now that I have a new baby on the way, I know I will want to tell the story of his/her birth. I thought that first, I should tell the story of Sam's birth. The details are a bit fuzzy since it was a while ago and I was pretty drugged up for some of it but I will do the best I can :)

If I remember correctly, it all started Friday night, 8/3/07. I consider that the start since that's when the mucus plug thingy came out. I knew then that it wouldn't be long and I was super excited. I never thought I would be so happy to see something so icky come out! During the day on the 4th, I talked to my Doula a couple times and she gave me some tips to hurry things along - sex and showers. I did as I was told and by Saturday night, I started to feel what I thought were contractions. Sometime in the evening my Dad and Step-mom came over and brought donuts. I think I ate 5 of them. I don't know if that was smart or not but they were awfully good! As the evening went along, I realized that I was definitely in labor. I walked around a lot outside since I knew walking was supposed to be good. I kept track of my contractions like a good girl and called the midwife when they got to where they were supposed to. We headed to the hospital and our Doula met us there. I was only 3cm but they admitted me anyway because I was group b strep positive and needed an IV. My plan was to give birth in the ABC. I had to stay in triage for a while until they found an ABC nurse. I walked around as much as possible. Things were really starting to hurt. I was trying to do low moans like my doula said but it hurt a lot and I usually ended up screaming. I was wandering around in the waiting room but they had me go back to triage because I was too loud.

The ABC finally opened and I went there. I was looking forward to the water tub since I had heard that might help a lot with the pain. I got in but it didn't do anything for me. I didn't like being confined in the tub so I got right back out. I ended up finding a comfortable position on a peanut shaped exercise ball thing. For the first time in a while, I was able to be relatively comfortable during the contractions. The midwife needed to listen to Sam's heartbeat but couldn't get it while I was on the ball. I had to lie on the bed which made the contractions super painful again. While I was on the bed, they broke my water. There was some meconium in the water. The heartbeat was not quite strong enough for them to be comfortable keeping me in the ABC so they moved me up to the regular labor area. By then I was quite out of my mind in pain. I was banging my head on the wall and trying to chew on my fingers to try to put the pain somewhere else. For some reason, this disturbed everyone but I thought it was perfectly logical. Anyway, since I wasn't doing a very good job of managing the pain, the mw recommended that I consider an epidural. By then I was ready to murder someone for one so I readily agreed. When we got to the labor room, I overheard one nurse tell another that it would be a while before the epidural arrived. This really freaked me out and I started to scream and yell and threw up all over the place. They gave me this other drug to use in the meantime till the epidural could get there. It was very nice and allowed me to lie quietly and wait to be fully dilated. I could still feel the contractions as a lot of pressure - very uncomfortable bordering on painful but no where near as bad as before. I felt bad taking it since I new it would get to Sam but I didn't see how I could handle the pain any more. It was so bad. I'm not really sure about the timing on all this. I know we go to the hospital in the middle of the night between Saturday and Sunday but don't know how long everything else lasted. After vomiting, I ended up being at 9cm. Only one cm left to go - yay! I finally got the epidural and it really didn't do much more in addition to the other drug. During this time, they had been monitoring Sam's heartbeat and it wasn't exactly where they wanted. But it wasn't horrible either. They did feel a c-section might be necessary and got me prepped for that.

I finally ended up at 10cm. Must have been somewhere around 3pm. They got me ready to push. I was told I had to hold my legs to push. I had kind of hoped I could just prop them up on something 'cause I really didn't feel like I had the energy to hold them. So, with each contraction I started pushing. It was hard! The mw was impressed though with the progress I made with each push. Happily it didn't hurt. The heart beat was still worrisome so they were trying to get me to rush Sam out before a c-section was deemed necessary. It seemed like I only pushed for a few minutes but I guess it was more like an hour. I was till a bit out of it from the drugs.

So, final push and Sam was out. They had warned me they were going to need to pretty much whisk him away due to the meconium they would need to suction out. They did hold him up for me to see and he was so beautiful!! He looked like himself right from the start which surprised me. I expected a more generic baby without recognizable features. He didn't have much of a cone head which made me happy. The medical people did their stuff and then brought him back to me. I made sure Warren followed when they took Sam away so that no one would steal him. When they brought Sam back, I just held him and stared in awe at him. He was so perfect! Everyone started to leave the room so I decided to try to nurse Sam for the first time. He did so good! I was happy since the main reason I wanted a drug free birth was to make sure nursing started out okay but he did so great even though I had to use the drugs. I loved him right from the start and felt that Mommy bond right away which was amazing to me. I had been scared that wouldn't happen for me.

The End :)

Sam (duh), while we were still in the hospital

End of nursing

I think Sam is done nursing. It has now been over 24 hours since he has nursed. While I still remember the last time, I want to write down the memory before I forget.

The last day was a Friday. I was working during the day so my mother-in-law was here helping with Sam. Sam started to get tired so Grandma gave him a ride in his little car till he fell asleep. When I moved him from the car to his bed, he woke up a bit so I nursed him back to sleep. I watched his little head bop up and down until he was asleep again. I watched his eyes close and his little body relax. I watched his little hand lay on my boob while he drank. It was a wonderful moment of closeness. He fell asleep pretty quickly (for him) and I took my boob back and left the room so he could nap.

He did nurse for a very short moment at night but it was so short and he was so restless that I don't really count it :)

For the most part, nursing has turned into a frustrating event for Sam as there is no longer enough milk to keep him interested. He mostly self weaned himself and only asked to nurse one or two times during the day. He is easily distracted from it with something else. I am mostly happy that he is done as I could use the break before the next baby arrives. I am also happy to have these next few months to really get Sam used to falling asleep without nursing and with Daddy instead of Mommy. Recent nursing has not been pleasant as it has been like trying to nurse an angry kitten - sharp teeth and claws included. I will always have wonderful memories though of nursing him as a newborn and infant - after the latch issues were resolved. It was so nice and peaceful to just sit in my big overstuffed chair and nurse my new little baby. I could play with his little hands or feet. I could feel the softness of his head and what little hair he had. I could listen to him breathe. I could also just sit and watch TV or read - wonderful moments of relaxation that don't happen often when caring for a baby. It was also nice as he got older - to have him come and pick up my shirt to let me know he wanted to nurse. To lie on my back with him on my tummy in the early morning while I tried to spend more time lying down in bed after he woke up.

Sam nursed for almost 18 months. I am happy to have made it that far. I probably would have kept going if not for the supply issue due to the new pregancy. I feel bad that Sam kind of got kicked off the boob by his younger brother or sister. I think he will forgive me though :)

This picture was taken by Brown Eyed Photograpy - www.browneyedphotography.com

Too lazy to think of a title

Well, so much for my plan to list a cute thing that Sam did every day. He's still cute on a daily basis, I just forget to blog about it. So, here's a list of recent cuteness :)

He gives kisses - real pursed lip, lip smacking kisses. He gives them completely umprompted and just to be affectionit.

He knows the word Love - he says it and does the sign for it at the same time. This is usually accompanied by a hug and or a kiss.

This morning, we were playing with one of his dolls that has a tummy you can press on and it says a little prayer. The doll is one of those little soft Precious Moments characters in PJ's and he's kneeling with his hands folded, very cute. Anyway, Sam can't yet quite figure out exactly how to press the belly to get the doll to say the prayer - but he loves listening to it. This morning, he grabbed my hand and put it on the doll and said, "Do it!" How nice that is one of his first sentences ;-)

He played in the snow for the first time today. I know we've had a lot of snow but today was the first day when it seemed warm enough, the sun was out, I had enough energy and we didn't have someplace else to be. I got some great pics which I will post when I get around to taking them off of my camera. He pretty much just crawled around in the snow, would try to walk, fall down and would crawl around some more. He had a big smile on his face and seemed to be enjoying himself.



If he finds a piece of trash on the floor, he makes Mommy or Daddy open up the trash can so he can throw it away. I have no idea where he got that from.

He dripped some water in his little car today and made Daddy get him a paper towel so he could clean it up. But, he then threw the paper towel on the floor. So, I guess his definition of trash just needs a little work.

He can pick out pictures of Daddy, Grandpa and cousin Wyatt on our fridge. Grandma's and Mommy do not like having pictures taken so they are not on the fridge ;-)

He does not nurse to sleep anymore. Instead, either Mommy or Daddy needs to lie with Sam until he falls asleep. We lie with him in his crib (have a bed tied up next to it with the front removed) and he snuggles up as close as possible to us and then will fall asleep - eventually - after maybe rolling around first several times and then getting back into position. This is also usually interspersed with several hugs, kisses, and instances of trying to jump off of the bed.

Sam got his first hair cut. He didn't enjoy it at all. But, we have a nice certificate with a lock of his hair and he's not looking quite so shaggy. He was back to his happy self as soon as the hair dresser was done and sat with Daddy while Mommy had 10 inches of hair cut off!

My Mom came over to visit the other night and when Sam saw her coming up the stairs, he said, "Hi there!" First time he has said that particular phrase - it was quite cute!

Well, that's all I can think of for now. I know that I have got to come up with other things to post about and they are there rattling around in my head but I want to get these memories down while I can before I loose them.